A pang of love

2012-01-17T23:52:00.000+08:00

I've decided to put You first above all, keeping to my promises. But now how am I supposed to shake him off from life without feeling remorseful and at loss, without any heartaches nor broken friendships. Its tough but I know its the best chance I've had.

2012. God is in favour

2012-01-01T07:36:00.003+08:00

A year had passed just like that, 2011 was definitely not a breeze yet i sailed through it safely. It passed so fast beyond my imagination and there were alot that happened in my life. I guess blogging isnt the norm for most adoleacents anymore but i just have a sudden urge to do so.

Bethany said that 2011 is a year of multiplication ad promotion and indeed i see that being so true. A side note, my weight has gained quite a sumful too but im determined to lose then this year muahahahaha.

I've drafted my resolutions for 2012 and i do hope i'll fulfill them, of which the most crucial is to be more patient. Before i even start on blogging about my wonderful hpliday, i'd like to say how much im grateful for Jesus Christ who truly is awesome, i think no words could ever express His unfailing grace and His greatness in my life. For everything He has done this year and how the story of "Footprints in the Sand" is really true. I must admit graciously that im afraid for whats in store for me this year but i know God is with me, why should i be afraid right.

Lets proceed to my holiday journey last year (its kinda surreal when i say that). So i went to 2 states only for almost 3 weeks which are California and Nevada. To sum it all up, it was fun and i was reluctant to go back to be truthgul. But pop always say "Theres a time for everything". So for the first few days i went Anaheim which is a pretty decent city with pretty minute buildings and we went Disneyland which wasnt that great as what i expected. We kept buying tacobells which could pass off as my favourite mexican fastfood restaurant cause of the cheese quesadilla with jalapeno sauce (really goooooooood food) and not to forget my CHURROS!!!! I went to so many forever 21 that its uncountable ( i told rai cry reb that if they ever come there they would go bonkers, f21 is huge). Certain branded things there are much much MUCH cheaper that they are all so mouthwatering, thank God my popmom gave us substantial budget if not we would have gone bonkers. Oh ya not to mention department stores such as Marshalls, Ross, Nordstrom Rack, Macy are soooo tempting. So all in all we just viaited a couple theme parks for the first few days but honestly the rides werent that nerve-wrecking, maybe cuz we didnt visit Magic Mountain where all the crazily terrifying rides are. By the second day we were so sick of American food that all we wanted was just to eat rice, no kid.

We stayed with my aunt for a couple of days and it was undoubtedly one of the most comfortable place ive stayed in the states. Moreover, i can get to play with my newly born niece called Noelle, she's such an angel. We had a very heartwarming Christmas eve where we had dinner together with sucha big family and ended off with gifts exchange and a few rounds of charades (hilarious). Then we moved to Las Vegas babehhhh and it was filled with quite astoundingly interesting buildings. It was quite unbelievable that the casinos everywhere were open to public view, even small kids like us could view distinctly the whole gambling scenes and also not excluding the fact that so many people do actually publicise and garner support for showgirls there. I watched "Phantom of the Opera" and "David Copperfield Dhow" which were mediocre i guess nothing fancy maybe due to the fact that im not a musically inclined person.

Our last 2 days were spent in The beautiful city of San Fransisco which what i thought to be the most meaningful visit i had throughout the trip. I had a ball of a time viewing all the different places of interest especially the Beauty Houses or something like that. And i ate at this place called "Crustacean" which had very very scrumptious garlic noodles, im not a fan of noodles but it was really one of the best noodles ive ever eaten. The last few hours were spent shopping around the district and United Square. It was thrilling the fact that i accompanied Martina to shop cuz she had leftover cash and thus we headoff by ourselves, the clock was ticking and we were almost late to go back to the hotel and head off for the airpprt. So we ran and ran like terrified girls partly cause of the homeless people who were rather intimidating but it was a memorable experience. One regret i had was not buying the Abercrombie shirt and pullover which wasnt that cheap considering i never thought too much of that shop beforr buy its alright my cash were spent on other better things. So there it goes the story of my vacation i hope whoever is reading this has a good one too!!!(prolly close to nil considering i closed this space for almost a year and nobody uses blogger anymore)

Lastly, I MISS THE COOLING WEATHER IN STATES and now im burning in indo.

Have a great new year everyone! Xoxo

2011-12-02T00:41:00.002+08:00

A really sudden urge to blog in this rotten space. I guess by now nobody visits this space anymore.

The year is gonna come to an end, how time flies real fast this year beyond my imagination. There has been good and bad times of course. I kinda miss how things were much simpler and genuine in the past but i thank God for everything that has happend. It taught me to be a better person each time round.

Things i would like to achieve in 2012:
1) Do my qt more regularly
2) Dont take things for granted
3) Work hard and play hard
4) Save up
5) Make a good impact on others' life

2011-11-20T23:38:00.001+08:00

Such a contrasting personality that it makes me sick

2011-10-12T15:33:00.000+08:00

God is good all the time. I'm thankful and no words could ever descrive my feelings now.

2011-10-03T20:54:00.000+08:00

Papa santoso is a sweet man as always. Despite being in an entirely different country, he still make the effort to ensure I eat my meals. I've not had dinner yet, studying so motivatedly despite my splitting headache in gwc my fav place. And suddenly dad told me of the things that my cuz cooked at home, such little actions meant alot to me. Just so you know, you're like that too just the simplest gestures you do daily makes me know how much you care.

2011-10-01T20:06:00.002+08:00

Hi i suddenly felt like blogging, it feels as though im void from this space for so so so so long. I guess time has passed surprisingly fast that it feels so surreal that im gonna end my year one in JC soon. I still remember a year ago how much we were all deliberating where we would end up in and never ever it came to my mind that i'll end up in MJ. It has been an exhausting yet interesting journey here but Im glad God always provide and He has the best plan for me. True enough, ive started to see the bigger picture of why i landed here instead of any other schools, i really do appreciate the life here and the people of course. Not to forget the xms-mj people that i really do cherish like oxt clyh ocy, they never fail to remind me of my cherished secondary school days. Its coool and made me wonder like how interesting life could turn out to be, becoming closer to certain people that ive never thought i would go near to. I could never thank enough for those who stood by me and giving me constant encouragement to pass my jc life even though i must admit its one of the most physically and mentally draining period in my whole entire life. People like mariana, janice and also my other family members who gave me the constant support all these while. I'd like to use this opportunity even in the midst of my exam period right now, to acknowledge certain people, even though they may not read this space anymore ever since ive closed it down since january.

Janice! Yeah baby i really do love you alot as my cousin although sometimes i feel that we're more like best friends than kins. We've been through alot together and i do emphasise the word ALOT, i think youre the sole person who really knows what im going through, the troubles and problems i really do face deep down. But oh wells we do share some of the most fun moments in life since our teenage years, there are too many to mention but i do cherish you alot and i can imagine our future together with our kids, sitting at a posh cafe drinking your favourite caffeine drinks whilst talking about life. (our most most most favourite topic). I know that ive been too preoccupied with jc life that i neglect you sometimes but im happy that we get to spend a portion of our rare times together on a weekly basis.

Mariana! Hehe my bed partner and bok although i know i may not be one of those people who expresses my true feelings well enough, or give you cards or surprises, but one day i'll surprise you successfully alright. I really really really am blessed to have a cousin like you who is truely genuine and considerate enough to always think about others before yourself. Ed is one lucky guy to have you and thankyou for being a mentor in my life who never fails to encourage me and brighten up my day. Cause i can always bully you and have one of the most memorable laughters almost everytime. Sorry if i give a displeasing attitude sometime at home hehe pardon my tiredness.

Chariss! Hello you busy woman and i bet you wouldnt even read this at all cuz youre so so so so busy beyond words. Well i miss you so much and i think theres no one that could ever replace you (obviously) but as in i doubt theres anyone else that i could trust so much as i could to you. We've been there together since forever and despite us being busy now and oh well talking so rarely, i really do appreciate the times we spend together even though it may just be a simple meal. It makes me feel that everything is still the same everytime i get to talk to you for long hours, lets meet up soon after promos! Sucha smart girl pls impart me some knowledge!

Petesu! Hi petesu, my best brudder ever. Do you know that youre one of the most influential christian friend that i have? And i guess it was not by mere chance that God sent you to 305 to be my angel right! I would always remember that fact and youre more like a sister to me actually than a brother. I can share almost anything to you, even the most irrelevant things like my cramps cycle and the clothes and etc that i just purchased off the rack. Yet you always remind me to be saving and not be sucha spendthrift, im learning and progressing and i guess a friend like you is hard to come by. Where there is no sister and brother that could coincide together in a person!

Celine! TWEENYHAIRY! ohmy i shouldnt have called you that and now here i am more hairier than i used to. hehe can you imagine we've been going school together since sec 1 up till today and i think we've so much fate together that God doesnt want to separate us just yet. Hehe thanks celine for everything, really youre so young yet so mature at the same time that makes me wonder if i really am older than you. haha, i remember posting something like"i talked to celine about anything under the sun stars and moon when we were late today and trying to escape assembly by sitting at void decks"in this space, oh gosh how i missed those days. And you know your message the other day after chem paper really could made me tear but i was so shy cuz i was at whitesands hmmmm thanks alot you know youre one girl that i really treasure cuz ure sucha great friend <3

I WILL CONTINUE SOON WITH THE REST PINKY PROMISE

OMG i realised ive so much to say to sooo many people yet i doubt i can complete this by today.... oh gosh i really do miss blogging where i could really recall how good life could be with people i really love and cherish in this life. I should do this more often to remind myself to complain less and treasure life more, life live happily. Yay.

gonna go study now, you can do it mich dont let a dejection bring you down.

2011-03-30T21:33:00.003+08:00

It truly disheartens me to hear a bad news from others, a loss of life that is so precious. Even the extent of the death was creepy, i hope she rests in peace. I may not have known her personally but i did once interacted with her and it saddens me to know how brutally killed she was. She does not deserve such a treatment from anyone, the world's vicious yet everyone would just move on with this incident, forgetting the past and still carries on their old habit without learning anything from that unfateful accident. May God bless you always A, God be with you. RIP

2011-02-24T20:03:00.002+08:00

Finally, i realised truly how much i missed my old companions, how much we would be able to talk about anything under the sun. Theyre the best people to be with, seriously. I miss those times when i can pour out everything that i want to and just be who i am truly is. i find myself having to float around a hovering ship yet i cant find my true life true identity inside, i know ive another year here. i hope God helps me and lead me the way. im scared im afraid i know i cant do all these alone.

2011-02-17T17:35:00.001+08:00

You know what: i love mjc and i love 11s411 and i love everything despite the hectic schedule and the amount of workload we need to do.

2011-02-14T18:35:00.001+08:00

First day of torture. Tutorials are not playing matter, im afraid of whats in store for me in the future but i can only hope for the best. God help me

2011-02-04T12:40:00.001+08:00

School's been fun, I like everything for now. Especially the fact that xinmin-mjc people are so hyper and bonded in a way. I hope this remains though chances are slim in the future when we all start our lessons. Chinese new year's been enriching and fattening cuz I've been eating like nobody's business here but i dont care cause when pe starts i think its enough to sap alot of energy frm within

2011-01-30T18:49:00.004+08:00

Officially in meridian jc, looking forward to tommorow. :)

I have so much to say, i'll hope everything's gonna be fine. So much empty promises it just gets so tiring i think i may withdraw any attempt these days. But im constantly reminded everyday that i have to be thankful in every circumstances, be thankful for this phase is inevitable. I've proven myself to be more sanguine than before.

Fresh

2011-01-27T19:04:00.002+08:00

What should i say about first day of school??? New life, new school, new friends but it seemed that i managed to befriend a girl today despite the fact that orientation doesnt start till monday. To be trurthful im not at all excited about my administrative group since theres only 4 girls and the rest comprises of mainly malay guys since we're grouped according to our alphabets. So far so good despite my pang of sleepiness that engulfs me but i hope tommorow will be better. Now, whichever school im posted to, i'll be thankful and accept anything that is in line. I need to sleep so badly now but i guess i'll just turn in earlier later on and meet with my dearest people first beforehand.

Snapshots

2011-01-24T14:21:00.011+08:00

1 week of fast

2011-01-24T12:06:00.002+08:00

Day 1: Spent a meaningful day at home, spring cleaning and lying in bed due to migrane.
Day 2: Spent a memorable day with c, did our usual talks, she swayed me so much that day. We laughed even harder at the theatre upon catching "Hello stranger". Back to the good old days, i'll miss you i THINK :P
Day 3: Met with xm after zillion years, caught up and shopped with her. I feel so englightened and glad that things are still good as gold as before, you know even we go on our separate ways, i'll still be here for you. Then i had to search high and low for carnival games for easter with marie.
Day 4: I had a day with sm, staying in her house and played with my macbook. She bought itouch off the shelf in a mere 5 minutes after she told me her intention. 7 yrs on the go! Finally that night, i know how to use a macbook after everything's installed, please dont mock me. Oh ya thank you to you too though i treated you starbucks already.
Day 5: I had less than 5 hours sleep and i went east coast early in the morning to cycle with the usual 5. Injuries here and there but we still had fun as always, i left for cellgroup that night and it was interesting.
Day 6: Church starting early morning, truthfully speaking i do enjoy coming there even though some may say why i bothered to attend them so often. At night that 9A1 boy treated the nostrils which came as a shock to me initially but since it has been a long time since i gathered with them, i enjoyed it alot. And of course meeting that scrubscrub cy and jy too and my dear gay son.
Day 7: Church again and then out with that prune for the whole day. Caught burlesque and i treated her as promised and it made her feel uneasy, hahahaha. I failed to dissuade her from buying more garments but i was proud i wasnt the least enticed by those clothes. I think the next time we would walk the whole orchard way till night would be months later.

IM STILL HOPING FOR A MIRACLE, I DO AND I BELIEVE.

2011-01-13T13:12:00.002+08:00

We are going on our separate ways, new friends would enter our social circle, new school would lure you in. I hope old friends like me wouldnt be replaced in your heart. After everything we've been through, 4 years of maturing to become better girls. I'll make the effort to plan something out, i hope by the end of 2012 we would still be as good as gold. This applies to every single one of you whose made a social impact in my life. :)

Give thanks

2011-01-13T12:46:00.003+08:00

I realised everytime i run beyond my own limits, i'll start to lose myself. Today it happened again for the second time in my life, all alone in the gym. Lying down half concious, i felt detached. Drained from energy, i lie motionless there till the colours of the world surge back to sight. I walked a few metres before having to sit down again to regain myself from the white scenes that lie before my eyes. And as before, i swear i would never run too long.

So this morning i submitted my choices of school that would be my second home for these two years. I hope i can get in to TJ which would need miracles from God once more since im short of a point to the science stream. Faith, that would be all i need for the next two weeks. Ýou know, God has been real awesome to have interfere so greatly in my olevels. Many may say that its only through my own zeal that i could pull of such a mark, but really its all impossible if not by the grace of God. I had difficulties with my humanities paper since i did questions that i didnt revise on, yet He worked His miracles greatly. Too much to say but I am greatful for everything despite the uncanny occurances that popped out at the incorrect timing.

Wish me luck, i hope i'll get in without appealing.

2011-01-12T22:08:00.005+08:00

It was good while it lasted, wasn't it. I'll engrave the memories and not let them slip by my mind.Through the vicissitudes of our friendship, i am greatful to have known you. Its enlightening that we're starting to bury the hatchet though not entirely, at least now we can blabber on like friends. I wished your future endeavours well despite the jaggered pathway that you may view it as, but it will all be better in time.

2011-01-09T23:20:00.003+08:00

I am disappointed too for my own reasons, i have so much to say but i guess i'll keep it mum cause isnt it for the best? I feel like ranting so much but what for if it would blow off another matter, i do admit i have my own faults but i do sincerely hope you would see yours too. I have no inkling what this year's gonna bring but really God, im not a fan of high and low. Its exhausting but i know i have to persevere to salvage this beautiful relationship we have cause i wouldnt want to lose someone dear to ashes again.

(3 days later)
I picked a verse from the daily bread pile, hoping that it would be a guidance to my life for the whole of this year. It hits the bull's eyes, i got just what i need, what ive been praying about for me to get untangled from. This means serious moulding of character, to be better as this is one aspect that i have been entrenched deeply to forever but now its time to shed off.

I miss

2011-01-07T12:57:00.006+08:00

you both so much.

As usual these overwhelming feelings will engulf me for days before being sanely normal again. To add on there's no souls to accompany me in the room for days, oh gosh. I know i havent been real good to bicker so much with them though by an hour later we'll laugh happily as though nothing has happend. But really, i love them alot. No more halma games nightly, nor blasting music and screaming at the top of our lungs nor playing compete in the swimming pool for quite a while now. Oh well, see you all soon.

Okay so im dying to have heart2heart with some of the most precious people i have in my life, meet ups with my favourite girls to EAT/SHOP and tour singapore with you know who you are. And lastly, have a full date with prune hopefully before she returns for a prolonged period of time.

2011-01-05T22:02:00.006+08:00

Someway or another, its bugging to feel that its easier if they are almost ubiquitous. But reality has it that time's chasing quick, the truth hits my face so severe that now the flesh is raw and susceptible. It'll pass before i know it.

On a sidenote, i have a bunch of very sweet pals that sent me mails by my doorstep in the event for a closure of 2010, its so traditional and at the very least, tangible remains for nostalgic moments in the future. Love you people :)

Oh ya he said to my face "te ingrasa" which is romanian which was dejecting, not entirely of course but truthfully statements like that motivates me further. THANKS ALOT!

2011-01-03T21:52:00.002+08:00

2011; Time to fight my nemesis internally.

Old & New

2011-01-01T23:25:00.003+08:00

I recalled exactly on 31/12/09, i whined about how boring 2010 would be with me having to face olevels and etc, but well who knows that it turned out to be one of the most dramatic and memorable year ive had in a while. I guess its true about the verse that stated "expect the unexpected". It was great i must say, worthwhile experiences that had mature me over time. Kinship, friendship and relationship had grown over the year, made new wonderful friends. I'm grateful for everything that had happend may it be good or bad cause at the end of the day its all for the best of me. Thank God for the guidance in 2010, never forsaking in times of need. Its indeed very enlightening. Now 2011 has arrived, I believe everything will be better. Mindset plays a great role in determining the outcome of our lives, i'll be optimistic about it. All will be well if I adhere to God's words and plans. I'll be a better person too. Aloha 2011, i sincerely hope you'll be more than great.

:)

2010-12-29T23:37:00.001+08:00

You know something,

i miss alot of people right now and am going to miss more in time to come. i should attend all the meet ups once my sissies are back. you know i know who you are.

2010-12-28T21:56:00.003+08:00

So my super stylish maid has a christmas party to attend in the bbq down the block tonight and martina's being an ass as always, she is screaming my maid's name right now down the block with her uber loud voice. Damn hilarious its really funny. One day she can be so frail and like a baby, vomitting in the mrt and making me take care of her intensively and now she's hyper as always.

2010-12-26T16:13:00.004+08:00

I LOVE INDONESIA.

oh ya, im supposed to head here and there these days but if conditions arent favourable, i'll have to dismiss all plans.

angst

2010-12-23T17:12:00.000+08:00

Actually, everything is beautiful, too utopian to be true. Just that when one seems out of place, it seems like thorns that prick bit by bit
Sometimes its tugging at your sleeves, waiting to chance upon you. When you least expect it, when your guards are down, that's when you need to be wary. It's concealed, its your deepest fear. Engulfing the mind, the soul and then the heart. Then when hopes are lost, fortunately new ones re-grew. That's just life, with its inexplicable cycle.

Every patience has its limits yet I finally think that its worth it.

hiho!

2010-12-20T22:08:00.005+08:00

1) 3 of the most unexpected people sent me fb messages today, what's with today I wonder.
2) I did facial and my face is quite horrid I guess.
3) Yet I still boldly went out to the mall despite the face state and ignore the weird stares. Great catch up with A.
4) I think I'm evil, inconsiderate and always take things for granted, not appreciating the sacrificies one would do for me. Thankfully I still have guilty pangs haunting me.
5) Voila, finally I'm meeting S and co tommorow,so eggcited. Its gonna be a great week tho I'll miss out my family times.
6) 24 dec please come quick, I'd like to see their reaction for the minimalist gift we presenting.
7) I'm starting to watch GG again season 4, and for the upteenth time, chuck bass is so hawt its irresistable
8) I miss mary and she'll only be back so long later, maybe after my olvl results.
9) Action speaks louder than words. Sometimes,your actions prove to be otherwise.
10) Merry Christmas in advance, earthlings! :)

De vacances

2010-12-20T08:07:00.000+08:00

First and foremost, i would like to thank some people who have been a great help to my research procedure, helping me find out about the essentials for my trip which are greatly appreciated. Its been a very enlightening trip, with amicable people greeting you wherever you go. Great time to distress for everyone, great place with unpredictable weather though. Well i think that the most exciting thing is the rides from the theme parks, its like one of the scariest but yet we enjoyed it much. The funny thing about my family is that everyone dares to take such rides except my dad, though he tried the waterfalls with very adorable reactions. Seriously, 90 degrees roller coaster is no joke with inverted ones and free-falls yada yada the list goes on but i like those rides cause time seem to pass real fast. Though one peculiar thing is that the shops close at 5-6pm and its quite annoying somehow. Anyhow im lazy to elaborate further, picture speaks a thousand words, you decipher it yourself.

2010-12-17T22:21:00.000+08:00

I'm finally back and glad to be at home. I'm burnt out. I realised I've so little time left back in indo yet I've so much to do, I wished I had more time here but oh well as what daddy always say there's a time for everything. If only...

Post again soon

Right now; Piqued

2010-12-09T23:24:00.000+08:00

Narnia/Rapunzel/Bombom car/Photobox/Eating 4 times a day/Watching dvds/ Settling one month belated birthday gift/ Walking around aimlessly/ Sitting down and catch up/ Knocking some sense into her/ Been on high streak these days/ Pranking people around/ Cycling around the neighbourhood/ Treadmill.

5 things:

1) Cycling is the new exercise.
2) Slow paced is the new lifestyle.
3) Overjoyed is the current mood.
4) Meet ups with great people after I'm back and before I depart to sg.
5) I'm going on behalf of my parents to take my sis report book tmr.

Goodnight

Entity

2010-12-07T22:56:00.004+08:00

She was once a naïve preety little kid and now, look at what she has become, talking about social life, fame and relationship all the time. She had a boy singing to her "just the way you are" and still feel so calm about it. He is a revered male figure in my eyeens, his sacrifices were too great to be true. He has the sweetest disposition, a little mischievious at times and unlike many, he smells real good even from a 50cm range. They always fought, bickered over the smallest things in the past. Time has matured them, physical fight is now kept at bay, they're even willing to spend much time together. We were best of friends, sharing the same surname despite the non-blood relation. Its been 2 years since we've met, 7 years we're apart and the mutual feeling's gone. Yet I feel enlightened that we both miss each other. I am a happy girl, life's too beautiful to be sad.

soul sisters

2010-12-06T21:46:00.005+08:00

Finally retrieved all the shots/I miss ketek quite alot, she's been away for a while and we'll only meet long later/ I'll post about what ive done so far in my beloved country soon/Im happy i found an inspiration for their presents. yay

shakespeare

2010-12-05T10:37:00.002+08:00

Yknow what: I'm hooked to romeo and juliet classical book. When they say he is a true poet, it is so true.

Vivienne westwood/marc/bcbg?

out of town

2010-12-02T09:56:00.002+08:00

So I'm now located at surabaya, a city that requires a flight approximately as long as from sg to jakarta. 3 days here and I'm strugglin with boredom as my companions were my grandparents, parents and aunts, 2 more days here shouldn't be a problem for me. My sisters aren't even around and I'm missin jakarta quite a fair bit. And the only entertainment within my le pliage is only a harry potter book, nano and blackberry. But even despite the mundane life, I still am thankful I learnt much things here... Oh ya, I think indo is a great place to grow more fats in.

2010-11-30T00:31:00.002+08:00

"Sharing struggles creates intimacy and trust between two parties. It breaks the ice, so to speak. No one really gets close to another if they bypass struggle. It is how relationships are deepened and improved"

So true. The foundation of close friendship.

Bros before hoes

2010-11-29T11:01:00.006+08:00

FOR Y'ALL

I think ojy has an evil scheme to make me be qualified for TBL with her, losing my collarbones and growing some double chin. Thanks anyway for the effort and gifts, my mom likes the raisins bytheway. Here comes the round days! And to ocy for you know what, the effort to make them and etc. Of course lastly, to the guys and your gay comments as always but nevertheless still a fun bunch. We're the: OLVL BREAKFAST PEOPLE!

(IM WAITING FOR OUR GRP FOTOS)

And also,

Our eating plans and post christmas party. My sisters are gonna join us btw.

And lastly,

owl best friend: i'll catch up with you soon, starbucks session again. Some up-to-date activities to do and maybe more eating. Wait till you turn 17!
jackass: martina's not gonna meet you for sure :) we burnt out cash yet we still eat expensive food, new beginning treaty!
siying: i miss you so bad its been ages since we've done what we do best! catch up soon when im back.
celine: badminton square real soon, gazing at stars above.
charissa: we're each furious with one another for our own weakness. (blood vessels burst, damn joke)

TO BOK: I miss you hohohoho, i want to see you dance dakidaki to chase the lizards away and say NOMA. But i'll only see that next year. see youuuuu

2010-11-28T01:20:00.003+08:00

I love the house when its on frenzy just like this. Its so late now and yet ive to wake up at 6am tommorow for a flight, i think i'll collapse in the plane and drop the intention of catching some sort of movie to while time away. You know i really do love my friends alot cause theyre about the sweetest thing ever, seriously speaking... I'll miss you guys alot. For the simplest effort of sending me off, the bunch of you and everything else thats uncountable, truly fortunate. I'll talk about this the next time i blog again.

So anyway i guess you'll chance upon this sooner or later. I just want to let you know that even though nothing would ever be the same anymore or far fetched from what i thought would be an ending to the year, i wish you all the best for everything. Im stuck as you saand I know that its impossible to revert back as long as im in the middle, but just so you know, the memories will stay. Someday maybe, normal would well describe everything. And life goes on for now...

2010-11-25T11:10:00.001+08:00

Holla to a new beginning, goodbye to you for good.

Euphoria

2010-11-23T12:15:00.003+08:00

Im very happy right now i just got my visa on the spot exactly an hour ago and this would mean that all my plans would be smoothsailing still. So ive caught up with some people and more to come soon, hopefully by the end of the week i will manage to complete my checklist. This two weeks holiday in sg is indeed a bliss, hopefully ive spent it well enough before heading back. The downfall of it is that my $$ is burned nearly to the core from daily outings but i'll save up soon enough to repent. Cant wait for sunday though, you know i know why.

2010-11-22T21:31:00.004+08:00

I think I'm rather peculiar at times, doing things that are an anomaly. I need to give myself solitary moment as a break and I hate throngs of people. I rather go alone at times especially for long journeys to indulge in the pleasure of being solo. Weird isnt it. But i found one who shares the same sentiments as me.

2010-11-20T10:31:00.004+08:00

So my fate would be decided on monday, break it or make it. The predicament is consuming me cause i wouldnt want to let both parties down. So i pray hard i would receive it on monday and all would be appeased.

I really need to do some catching up with some people, its been quite some time dont you think so?

2010-11-17T23:56:00.003+08:00

K as promised i shall post about jy and wl. Both of you are cute people to spend a day with, looking through guys' stuffs arent half that bad i guess. I enjoyed myself despite the many times we walk in and out the shops, at least for a day im off from girls stuffs, like eye refreshing maybe? STY, our newfound word and as im typing this i still recall of that red thing jy supposed to try on, damn hilarious seriously. hahaha and my anderson's finally i ate them after super long. And specially for maho post, my exposed self identity that is only seen by you alone and no one else should just be kept between us okay, i swear nobody else would have to see all those things (you know i know, maho) ever again. From the mismatched to the facial expressions to you bonding with my cousins (first ever friend who are that friendly to my family). Aye actually much memories down here at chuan park right. Thanks to you i started watching tv madly again and that isnt sucha bad thing afterall. And for the constructive comments turns out you are good in this kinda thing. And i can totally block you off in prom unless youre gonna wear heels and beat my height :) Kay, stop being so shy to eat in my house or else you'll really grow skinnier hanging out so often with me. Im so tired of walking, goodnight.

2010-11-17T12:04:00.002+08:00

Months ago. Miss you guys.
See you all soon and jakarta here i come... I miss the food there, i think i'll just be rounder when i get back from there.

2010-11-14T21:10:00.003+08:00

Christmas is coming and i shall never forget the true essence of it.

2010-11-13T08:23:00.005+08:00

10 things:

1) OLVL IS OVER, TIME TO REJOICE
2) I lost my ipod
3) I lost a friend
4) Yet someone said to be thankful always in all circumstances
5) Yet behind all these, i can see a better plan that God has in store
6) My dad is always the first everyday to wish me goodluck in bb.
7) A true gentleman falls short of his glory as he tends to overlook the true desires of a woman.
8) I caught a glimpse of a drafted post months ago and realised truly you're unworthy of my woe. From time to time, you've committed the same misdemeanor and it just nauseates me.
9)I'll kinda miss those weekend gwc times, walking through a long long path for a morning exercise and tryin to convince ourselves that no man should take their toll on our lives. Snapping the memories inscribed within our hearts.
10) Hometownsick.

Endurance

2010-11-02T14:39:00.000+08:00

" You did not lose heart, you did not stop fighting, you did not quit.
When your attitude stinks, it means your heart isn't right.
If we win we praise Him, if we lose we will still praise Him.
Fight and strive till the end."

Blessed

2010-10-24T20:15:00.002+08:00

I feel so blessed for the Lord's peace is within me, inscribed within my heart. For the people He has sent to be pillars of support, I am thankful. Im appreciative of what others did to spur and encourage me, for every single thing they have done to not let me veer off my path to triumph. Actually, i realised there are far more people who cared than i know and this enlightens me so much that I feel a surge of strength overwhelming. I leave it all down at Your hands for ive worked my part and now its Yours to play. All the best to the rest of the people out there, its the beginning of our race and everyone will be winner.

2010-10-21T07:49:00.003+08:00

My source of solace, the tower of refuge and strength, in You I believe everything would be fine.

IM HAVING A MAJOR SLEEPING DISORDER, I SLEEP AT 2 DAILY AND WAKE UP AT 8 WITHOUT FAIL. CAN SOMEONE TELL ME HOW TO SLEEP IN TILL AT LEAST 10?

at least this could allow me to do devotions in peace at an early hour.

2010-10-15T23:37:00.002+08:00

i wouldnt want myself to be too accustomed to this distant state, it isnt surreal... yet i find myself plunging down further into that phase of obtaining containment from other beings who seem to care more. its fragile, like a bubble.

Goodbye blogger till olevel ends.

2010-10-12T15:42:00.002+08:00

I found out that eric's spalding can be a real help to distress when i started bouncing it off the wall and playing with it for a good half an hour. I feel like exercising to feel rejuvenated by that endorphines produced but well not today, i still gotta finish my physics even after torturous hours of history that nauseated me. Tonight i shall pamper myself with some retail theraphy, eating ice cream in town and revision at the bottom of my list. My daddy is quite out of the ordinary parent who encourages me to go shopping during this study break and he'll pay for anything i purchase off the rack just to enlighten me due to my incessant complaints. I miss you guys, sometime the guilt of not communicating enough consumes me.

Goodbye.

2010-10-12T11:03:00.002+08:00

"He knows our burdens and our crosses
Those things that hurt, our trials and losses,
He cares for every soul that cries
He wipes the tears from weeping eyes"

So what do i do now when i know the prospects of the future is high and my feelings dont match up my thoughts. That i go back against my words and i forgo my promises for something unworthy of the cost. Countless, thats the amount of time ive done it. Why am i that meek to advance...

2010-10-10T21:25:00.003+08:00

Look at whats on her head seriously...

Ive been camping at gwc recently and i guess it has been a productive place to study in. Not forgetting the dosage of coffee i drank there. Today is a real astonishing day that i still am amazed by the coincidence and all the plans that God has laid out in front of me. To say the truth, it was so torturous to watch serene eat her burger with my stomach churning and urging me to buy one but i resisted it and got some healthier food back at home. I was indulging with her on the thoughts after the olvls, the amount of good food we would consume, the shop-till-we-drop kinda feeling again, the stuffs we would purchase to reward our diligence and the movie marathon that has been postponed for ages. Hanging out at gusttimo to talk about anything with no restrictions to the time limits.Oh man, i really am anticipating for that day to arrive! Toil toil toil toil now michelle, endure just for a short while more...

Dedications

2010-10-09T11:21:00.004+08:00

Finally its the first day of study break, i just am done with laps of swimming and here i am idling at home thinking what to do before heading to church. Lets start of by my promised post of dedications to people.

CNSH: Well its been a long 4 yrs of friendship, much of my school based memories are inclined to you. I'll never forget the memories together, the smoothsailing and tough times we waded through. Youve been a great friend definitely, sticking up to me even despite my frailty and weaknesses.The rest are written back in the card i gave you. :)

CLYH: For 4 years ive been going school with you, the one whom i spent my most solemn mornings with. The memories through our worst latecoming year, rendering us to hang out at the void deck till the reading periods are over. We'll then talk about anything under the sun, moon and stars (sounds familiar, our old phrase?) Well you too have been one of the greatest treasure i found in xms.

OCY: Chickchick, you're one of the girls that i admire most for your friendly disposition, the ability to just interact with people from different walks of life. Its enlightening to have known you all these while, the times we shared together, the talks we had for hours, the revision we did together. Love you, just so you know that you could always call me up if anything crops up. See you real soon.

JY LOOK HERE: ELIZABETH FREDDO ONG! HAHAHA WE WERE SUPPOSED TO DRINK GREEN TEA SOYMILK TODAY BUT WE DIDNT! I LIKE THE LONG 159 RIDES HOME WITH YOU THEN WE CAN TALK. THE WAY YOU WILL TELL ME STUFFS AND SMS GAY SHIT THANGS BUT ITS OKAY. BUT THE SUNSHINE YOU IS BETTER THAN THE RAINY DAYS DEFINITELY. DONT TRY TO BURN MY HAIR ANYMORE K, HAHA I THINK I WRITE THIS IN EVERY SINGLE CARD I GAVE YOU. K SEE U SOON MY DEAR, MAYBE LIKE FRIDAY?

AL: Hi my only indo friend in this school! I could still recall the first time we met a year back, which was just so coincidental. Friendship blooms and i'll never forget everything we've been through together as friends. Dont suppress yourself too hard, letting it go may be a better choice... Its entertaining talking to you in msn bytheway!

RT: Rhombus, been ages since ive called you that! You're one of those girls that i really enjoy hanging out with. Though its only recently that i spent the longest hours with you only just the two of us. Haha, i will always associate you with irish republic army cause thats what brought us close together and i do appreciate the listening ears to my slipshod comments.

XT: Hello there wallpaper! Stop idling your ass off and start mugging hard. I'll miss your sudden rush of euphoria and your cheerful personality! The talks and memories we had back in xms. Now that you've crafted a marking on the side of my head (your teeth!), i'll always remember you for sure. Youre not nice to hug but see you real soon!

JE: I think i'll always associate you with CHINESE! Its from there that we grew to know each other better. I really do appreciate the times we spend together, the toiling and prayers made together. Ive never done it before in school in my entire life but it made me feel a sense of comfort to know that there's actually someone to do it with me. Love you much.

SY: We used to call each other gossipmachines but over the years, i realised we gossiped less but confide to each other more about ourselves. I cherished all the times we spent together, going down to vball court to watch their matches and spend hours in the bustop talking afterwards. Its comforting to know that i can always confide in you despite the inadequacy of the opportunities. Dont mia on us and better meet up even after graduation.

XM: Hi white prince. I like how we would sing a song to distress ourselves and my morning assembly would be accompanied by you. I'll miss you definitely even though i'll be seeing you somewhere next week. Pardon me if i burden you with all the stories and problems i confide in and also, thanks for the reassurance that im not solely the only one who're facing it. <3 you for everything.

PS: Ogre! *puppy eyes, i know you cant resist the feigned innocence that i put up. Our friendship doesnt end here, does it? We still have to accomplish our TWG dining and the search for appetising meals to suffice our appetite. I really do admire you for putting up with my elongated talks about religion and faith, of which not many could endure it... God bless you always brudder, see you soon!

WL: I'll always treasure this 4 years of friendship, though many times we found ourselves drifting apart for a period of time. However, on a lighter note, we could confide in each other well enough eventually. To tell you the truth, you provide one of the best advices around and i guess many times i do fail to live up as a reliable friend. But anyway, my phone is always available in times of need.

MJ: Jackass, you're one of the most exaspterating person around but yet unexpectedly, someone who listens fervently when i need a listening ear. Despite the ups and downs of this friendship but its cool to know that we have each others backs in times of need. It doesnt mean that we dont hang out as often it would mean you lose the status quo as a special friend of mine k! See u for some studying soon.

PRATOS SON: You've been through alot but i look up to your resilience to strive hard. Love is a battlefield and you proved yourself to be a respectable infantry. The genuine concern and care you showed is truly inspiring and my nonchalance at times left me abashed for not doing more. Rest assured after olvls are over, i'll be right on track to listen all your woes. Still the best son around nonetheless.

There are others too whom i like to acknowledge, you know who you are. Am still thankful for every single soul that has played a part in my school life.

drained

2010-10-06T20:44:00.003+08:00

Dishevelled, i found myself falling deep into an unknown pathway. But i guess ive found motivation in studying again somehow after meeting besty ytd. Maybe that last sentence before we part impacted me, saying about how much it needs to be initiated than forced. It was supposed to be teaching session yet we ended up talking till midnight and yet thankfully, i pulled through in school today. I need some sleep badly, ive been sleeping late these days.... 10 hours of library session soon, anyone?

2010-10-02T21:33:00.002+08:00

"Hope can be ignited by a spark of encouragement"

Life's been repeating its routine from time to time. Tiring but yet i can see my life one month from now, how much liberty would i grab hold of. I have so much in mind yet i cant rant it out here, i know whats for the best but yet i dont know if i can ever commit myself to do it. Guard it tight, dont let any slip of thoughts ooze in.

Entrenched

2010-09-25T10:49:00.003+08:00

one of the greatest things in life, is friendship. you'll always have my back.

Irreplaceable

2010-09-24T18:27:00.004+08:00

The last thing i expected myself to do in graduation ceremony was to tear up, its just so difficult to hold back everything when mdm tien hugged me with her remarks that stirs up the emotion within. Next comes arlinka, she hugged me and muttered incoherent lines that i began to tear again. Tears dont flow easily for me yet today it proved me wrong, without momentous effort needed and it flows freely. Now deep down within, there's just this reluctance to leave this school once again after all these while being so flustered about the conformity of school life, desperately wanting study break merely for a respite. This school has so much deeply rooted memories that would stay within, great friends and teachers that have impacted my life in a way or another. I'll never forget you guys, especially those close to my heart, always and forever.

2010-09-23T22:20:00.000+08:00

What a predicament for me to face, tell me Lord what should i do now? Everything just seem so perplex, the pathway so dim that i am in dilemma of which journey to take now. I am not a master in being pretentious. My mind is constantly in a state of roller coaster ride, finding an answer to an unsolvable riddle just yet. Only time will tell but yet patience is too far fetched from my character. Maybe its Your decision to mould me now since i asked for the fruit of the spirits to be bestowed upon me. To be a better person maybe, but what ogre says that forgiveness comes along with forgetting.

GOODBYE.

2010-09-20T20:12:00.002+08:00

Sometimes i wonder if a great figment there is to life is just chasing after our stationed dreams, attaining one certificate after another, all of which seem like a plausible pathway that i see in many lives. The strain that is burdened on every single student to excel is overwhelming isnt it, all of which wouldnt just cease when olevels end, but still perpetuate till the next stage of life in store for every single beings. What is the main goal for all these? Is it just to bring glory which would render oneself in euphoria for that few moments and poof, all of the contentment disappears again upon facing the harshness of life that the survivality chance is low with no close proximity to sucess if unable to sustain the excellence? In times like this, rapture or even a greater dedication to religion seems like a panacea.

Family is home

2010-09-18T22:28:00.005+08:00

Did i ever say that my family is like the cutest ? I wouldnt trade them for anything else.

Anyways, i tried studying at starbucks alone the other day and its productive maybe i shall go solo again someday. Hehe, so english is a major disappoinment, i shall toil for it and prove myself wrong that i can excel for english. Thats all, im gonna do my best till olvl starts.

Its the 9th, coming 10th. time flies like an eagle.

2010-09-12T21:27:00.003+08:00

To accept Christ, it costs you nothing. But to follow Christ, it costs everything.

my eyes are kinda sore after watching 3 series of resident evil. i promise this is the last of my idling days, goodbye.

tmj

2010-09-12T17:21:00.003+08:00

hi mj this is your promised apology post for forsaking the meals during this holiday twice. Im sorry for everything but ive tried my best to explain to you and well i hope i can update you with everything when school reopens. Cheers my friend i know i can be such a pain in the ass at times but nonetheless you're way worst. I dont usually dedicate any post to anyone but well this guilt is drowning me. k so overrated. goodbye jackass.

2010-09-12T00:55:00.001+08:00

HELLO THIS POST WILL JUST BE A WASTE OF YOUR TIME SERIOUSLY.

i think that my cousin is a joker, im staying at her house tonight along with eric and she is peacocking. WTH but its damn hilarious. i know you will read this and bbm me straight but hey you're lucky enough im not revealing your name here. anw i watched resident evil today and i was blabbering, laughing,scaring, talking to the above mentioned and well she shrieked on one part when the zombie zoom out. but oh well this movie aint tht great such an anti climax ending, which left me so bewildered why the movie ended hanging like that. although we three may be left behind in singapore but at least we're having much fun back here and i do really enjoy your companies though soon the 3 of us may be preoccupied with our lives and barely have time for each other. and i think im kinda over the top high today thats why im talking so much here and posting nonsense but oh well its been sometime isnt it. im happy enough i got a pair of shoes that i can wear out and run in it if i miss any bus/train. but well sadly enough i wanted a blouse so badly from zara but why isnt the look worth the price thats why i give it a miss. also,i have an engagement ceremony to attend tommorow and well im wearing white dress which i kinda will get paranoid about coz its so easy to be stained by anything. i will shop for a teeny weeny little while tommorow after everything, i feel like splurging my money away which is an ominous sign, i will control myself. i feel like working in like maybe ice cream shops, anderson sounds good thanks to that greedy guy who tempted me and would like to exploit the chances by stealing some portion if im working in any ice cream place. if i ever get fatter or look like a ball after working there i will so find you for revenge. but anyway the night is not so young anymore and ive gotta wake up like at 730 tommorow i dont know how. school is starting and im kinda dreading it coz it would mean full engine to be started till the day comes. olvl is so boring can you be over real quick and make my life more peaceful. and oh yeah i havent talked about my volunteer work at minds today, well its quite heartwarming with those kids welcoming you with such wholehearted enthusiasm, feels like you're a significant person when you barely even knew them. i guess after witnessing all those, i feel much more fortunate than before to have whatever i own now, good health, family, friends, life, a chance to experience an education that some may be deprived of, whilst at this exact second im typing this, others may be tormented by extreme poverty, living in an unsightly conditions.time to hardcore study starting next monday and say goodbye to my favourite things which now sadly is vampire diaries. oh well, i gotta stop yammering before this gets even longer.

goodbye.

Gaining ground

2010-09-10T11:05:00.004+08:00

HELLO, HAPPY BIRTHDAY MONICA!

Step up 3/Step up 3 3d/ Preety Little Liars/ Salt/Eclipse/ Airport/CityHall/Marina/Cupcake surprises/Happy anniversary/Haji Lane/NYDC/Pluck/Irish bar/Handburger/BBQ/Poolside party/ Home with half wet body/Night jogging/Playground cooling/Swimming/Sleepover/studying.

People do really come and go but the weirdest fact is that when one departs, another old friend arrives and the cycle repeats itself, isnt it so ironic. The other day when i was staying over at J's, we were reminiscing about last year, how much of fate it was rather than pure coincidence. Meeting P and Z was all meant to be, those memories with the latter may be scanty but it was worthwhile despite the truancy i committed and the long months of momentous overcoming process. Well to cut the story short, I really am greatful for some people in my life who really are there for me when the rest of the world walks out , giving me thorough support even if they dont really show it on the outside. Those who bothers to listen and enquire when i really am down the drain even though sometimes i dont spill out any beans, its still the thought that matters. Before this carries on further, you know who you are who fit the above mentioned description and just wanna specially thank c for all these while, the regular smses and strict procedure you set for me on how to handle those idiotic beings and i know im not such a disciplined person to break some of them from time to time and fell to the wrong trap again. Jeez but i outlasted all adversities.

Goodbye,
im looking forward to tommorow.

Retrospection

2010-09-08T20:02:00.002+08:00

You'll never learn to embrace the beauty of the universe if you dont start to let go of what hurts you most and open up your hearts to the world.

Peculiar

2010-09-08T15:03:00.008+08:00

Tryin to figure everything out, but hopelessly no answer to all. Jeez what are you actually trying to pull off this time round ???!!! Revenge of the mummy?

they're off to hk without me, for a moment yesterday i was considering to buy a last minute ticket but dropped the idea. lack of sleep made me cranky but ive only myself to blame for succumbing to my line of weakness. ive tried to replenish all the loss by sleeping 3 hour yet it seems as though it doesnt suffice my needs. i forsake all plans to meet c for studying today in exchange of a good peaceful day at home. i should get in touch with my books again, its been two solid weeks or more? since ive come into any contact with them.lastly,i realised that ive so much to do so little time. now all my promises to some have to be thrown aside.ohmy...

2010-09-05T23:11:00.004+08:00

"Tune your anxious heart to patience, walk by faith where sight is dim. Leave everything in His hands and He will give you rest. For patience means awaiting for His time without doubting His love"

drive me closer to the day where all liberty lies

Power in tounge

2010-08-29T18:30:00.002+08:00

Begin to call things what they're supposed to be. Its time to change the words that are uttered from the mouth. Those words may affect the circumstance that you're in. Pleasing words that build the spirit, believe in them despite the shortcomings. Speak blessings, God may turn the situation around.Faith has to be imparted in life . You know why situation doesn't change? There isn't faith to kick the problems away, undesireable words spoken to empower the mind's will. God surely will cause it to past, call out to pleasing words to strengthen the heart in spite of the mind being a battlefield. It is so

So ive given much thought to life, what my plans for the future are and im determined to carry them out despite the much anticipated exhaution that i'll face. Sometimes i wished i could have lives like them, so carefree with no worries, whiling their lives away with all the hustle and bustle of the city. Its just that ive this self-built responsibility that ive to fulfil, i'll never want disappointments flowing from their eyes, the windows to their souls. Ive also realised that there's an absolute threshold in my approach towards life compared to many but im fortunate enough if not i would have never imagined how loose i'll be. Even despite all the shortcomings and lacks that i've, i am still greatful for all that i am even if that means i've less than them.

K IM GOING ON A MAJOR GETAWAY FROM BLOGGER

Strength in dire

2010-08-28T08:20:00.005+08:00

It was a rush hour friday.Managed to catch HeartBreaker, merci merci. Stayed in andersons for 3 hours talking about just everything that there is in life till the night cracks in. Unstitched an old wound after so long i finally spit it out, dont be too astonished just yet my girls. Wednesday more to come for some fine dininig in high end place. Love you all much for everything, the priceless advices and support.

Anyway my mundane life camping at bishan library sipping coffee is over, now its time for some relaxation before imma start trudge my last way through. My regime of 430am wake up time has rendered my facial condition to be way off now, i need my beauty sleep soon. The overwhelming relief that surged in when all the tough papers are over was certainly comforting. Time to catch up with life, the hottest news in town ,spare sometime to be still and pray.

Goodbye, its early but im very excited cause i finally can attend church with a mind of peace, no strain burning through reminding me that i have not revised just enough. Throughout the whole week, I was always reminded to give thanks despite all circumstances that befall me. Trying my best.

2010-08-20T21:42:00.002+08:00

I think im such a pain in the ass at times, apathetic if i had to judge myself. Indifferent to the inflicts ive left behind even if im sanguine about everything i did. Such jovial demeanor will only bound to invite doom, backfire all the main prospect. I ought to be more tenacious but yet i cant bring myself to execute it. Im washing off my hands for good, all cells should hail to studies, the only disease that can plague me for now. Nothing else.

2010-08-20T04:46:00.001+08:00

Its 430 and I'm awake studying history cause nothing came into my brain ytd and I'm going to have conversation about cold war with charissa soon who was awake since 3. This is totally random but goodbye

Muchas gracias.

2010-08-18T22:02:00.002+08:00

Thank God for everything that has been given to me. When He said that nothing is impossible, it certainly isnt. When the song playing in my head "Mighty to save", certainly promises are never broken. All glory goes back to you only.
Blessed.

2010-08-15T18:04:00.003+08:00

Hello this is so nonsensical the fact that facebook now bans me from posting comments which was meant for my appreciation for whoever wished me. Nevermind the remaining few i shall reply them later on.

So thank you to sslcm,jjc,ssb,bbc for celebrating with me on friday. Love you all alot seriously very touched for everything. And also marie tan who spend countless hours in decorating a cake specially for me. Eric and serene for waking up so early to eat breakfast with me. My family too for everything they've done, their efforts and everything. And everyone else too whoever plays a part in my life, for the wishes cards and presents.

Be back soon

Hope is contagious

2010-08-10T11:04:00.003+08:00

I slept at 4 am yesterday, been sometime since i kept sleeping beyond my usual timing. Was supposed to study by staying over yesterday but wasnt productive the fact that we talked more than we should and i went online at 2am which lasted for quite sometime. I made a vow to her, telling her i'll stop all these nonsense that ive been doing, foolishly trapped in this vicious cycle that never ends. I'll never break those promises, i won't, even if it takes me painstaking effort to accomplish them. Thank you my dear, for the listening ears for the trust you put in me to the extent of revealing so much aspect of life thats more than meets the eyes. Good morning and goodbye.

Letters to God

2010-08-08T22:38:00.000+08:00

2010-08-08T14:01:00.003+08:00

You know, the best thing that was ever presented to me was my family. Its comforting to know how much truly this family loves me for who i am, never once they gave up on me despite my actions that do not display the best of what it should be. The warmth that they provide truly made me understand that family is home. I love you all.

2010-08-02T17:52:00.005+08:00

Hello there. As much as school is exhausting due to its rigidity, i still do have much anticipated moments like unceasing laughters daily. I think my daily dosage of laughter would suffice my needs to distress. Im very eggcited my mommy's coming over in 2 days time though her main purpose here isnt entirely for me but i am very ecstatic still. This would mean i wouldnt be able to go to school alongside with celine for a few days which would render me being so lonely for morning journeys. I have to also wake up at least a quarter hour earlier cause i'll travel from fairmont in cityhall instead of chuanpark in lorongchuan. Anyways, I love dora despite all the hateful comments others made about her which i disagree completely. She is a very sweet teacher by going the miles to coach my english oral which isnt up to standard, i am going to strive hard. I will, should, have, must start studying diligently for olevels instead of sharpening my acute skills of procrastination. Everyone out there should too. Goodbye i think i write to much, time to cut loose all these "distractions". I need some sleep.

Cry of the heart

2010-08-01T20:04:00.002+08:00

Love my family, friends, thank God for them.

Life may not always be a bed of roses, raging seas may swallow you whole, scraping through your last bit of vigour where all thats left seems like a pit of doom. Yet it all boils down on how your perspective through it all, to view it as a delightful endeavour or just be digging further in a bottomless sorrow. Come what may you say that ive never been through all those torments to ever have the rights to make any remarks, but the definition of problems may differ from each entity. Everyone has adversities to face but the outcome may just vary relative to our prospect.

2010-07-29T17:52:00.003+08:00

" The thing about love is I never saw it coming. You kinda crept up and took me by surprise. And there's a voice inside my heart that's got me wondering. Is this true? I wanna hear it one more time"

I feel like swimmin but the pool's crowded enough. I feel like doing my work but i wouldnt budge. I feel like running to prespire but i know i would end up feeling faint. I feel like talking to you but ive got nothing much else to say to conceal my disappoinment. I feel like sleeping but the sun hasnt set yet. I should stop wasting my time in front of this screen, get going with life.

miss u all.

Homesick

2010-07-28T20:40:00.002+08:00

Feeling preety much like what the title says these days, just to be home, sitting on my favourite space to do my work. Even though most of the time i lose concentration but this gush of overwhelming feeling of being at home surfaced everytime class ended. Maybe i'll forgo studying in school for sometime. Its sort of a good habit too, arriving home early which would mean ive more time to talk to my family, especially my dad through bbm. I find it pleasing that my dad actually knows more or less whats going on in my life and we would exchange views about faith and religion perpetually. So to those who tried to discourage me from spending time to pursuit my faith, try to put yourself in my shoe cause i never once complained nor regretted attending them.

My dad thinks im under great mental exhaution that he encourages me to go shopping to revitalise my mind and just sidetrack from this utter tedium. So imma get down to scape this saturday night to go browse around in flee with my girls and searching high and low for my sunday school stuffz on sunday. In hope to replenish my energy, do some eye-washing though im dubious about the fact that it would satisfy my wish. I went to accompany marie yesterday to buy her cake decorating stuffz, yet little did i know i would be lured by the scent of the ingredients. So, it would be a high probable chance that imma bake for people this holiday. Lets hope its edible to be given out.

Ok i should go and study for my tests tmr.

2010-07-25T19:27:00.007+08:00

So im bend on studying dilligently now.

Sunday after church- Great world city
Saturday evening- angmokio library.
Monday-Friday-school.

Yay.

Coffee makes me light headed and nausea today. This feelin's bothering, feel like just binging. Was so sleepy due to sleeping merely 5 hours that i did -.- and that seehui laughed her ass off, spent half an hour talking to keep ourselves awake. She look so preety in that red dress im still laughing madly about it, right? Im so lazy i always feel like sitting down even in bustop and buses ride. I have to wear apron for sunday school with food on my pouch and those kids would swarm around me tryin to fish out the snacks. I have to get my priorities right, no procrastinating, no surfing of net for hours anymore. I should reduce my duration of being online once im in msn cause i know i can last up to 5 hours there, only to feel remorse after all's done. From now.

Goodbye.

2010-07-23T22:17:00.004+08:00

Im back from n2d run, am proud to say that i ran at least a km and walked 5 km.
Enjoyed myself with chengyee, arlinka , jiayi and celine though subway was full house and i cant eat my anticipated sandwich. Catch up with you all soon again!

& Celine, acknowledgement to you here for everything, revelations made that i never knew would ever be uttered. I guess that walk and meander to home isnt superfluous. Now i know im not a lone soul fighting against the vicious world, the fact that someone else have the same experience as i do enlighten me as i know im not rowing alone. Whatever ive been bottling up is finally poured out, i feel light and empty again in a good way. I guess i just needed someone to rant it on to in order for normality to kick in again. And im good again for sure. We have to focus for OLVL now, nothing else should distract us at all. Fort canning/botanical soon :)

Now time to get the engine going, we can do it !

2010-07-21T21:32:00.006+08:00

HAHAHA I KEPT TO MY WORDS. I POSTED IT, CHARISSA. I STILL CANT HELP BUT TO LAUGH IM SORRY, JUST THINK OF THE BRIGHTER SIDE THAT IT ACCENTUATES YOUR FIGURE.

Novel experience in wearing ethnic costume, whole new experience. Definitely memorable.

2010-07-19T22:35:00.000+08:00

Que sera sera, what will be will be.
The future's not ours to see, que sera sera.
What will be will be...

Inception's down, despicable me's down. Eclipse's next.
i should start studying and quit fooling.
SHOULD I STAY OVER FOR NIGHT TO DAY?

Child-like faith.

2010-07-18T19:17:00.002+08:00

How should i put my thoughts into words? I guess its indeed indescripable, as always. The true unconditional love that none could ever offer. The young yet spilling with faith, praying unceasingly, better than many of us here. Their smiles to show that despite my worn out body kept me concrete, responsive to their needs. Its my honour.
God bless.

Fast.

2010-07-11T20:33:00.001+08:00

Leap of faith, hope, love.

Faith begins when man's power ends. Human ought to have a childlike heart for faith shines brightest there, instead of grumbling in dejection. Whereas hope is to envision things that are not yet true, or to cherish with an expectation of obtainment with the exception of anxiety. Love is the most important, its when other's needs are prioritised over our own. Love is patient, love is kind, never afraid of giving too much. Remember that prayer changes things, even though the answer is given much later. Never back down nor be forlorn whenever what we prayed for were never answered, remind ourselves what sacrifices have been made in exchange for our eternal salvation. Remember it well and whole, only then your pride will be held in place as what are we if not for the abundant grace given to us. Its only time to give thanks.

2010-07-09T18:56:00.003+08:00

I look so tall here yea i am with 8cm heels.

Dear God, give me immense strength to live off the next few months as the journey would be exhausting. The faith to never back down, to continue striving and achieving the aims. Anyhow, was reading all the notes on the yearbook my way back home alone, i realised that i am truly blessed. For everything, everyone that has impacted my life in a way or another. For all the encouraging words, sincere messages, or even just signs of appreciation . Truly i will miss everyone when we part ways. To all, goodluck for the mugging of Os

2010-07-08T18:01:00.005+08:00

"A good attitude and the right focus help us to handle life joyfully, even though it doesn't change our circumstances"

My memory's so bad i forgotten many of the occurences in my life. Even if it holds a significant meaning. Trying my best to recall, but to no avail.

Is it me or just the slight ignorance from others that they start to be unable to recognise me. I will find myself in a position whereby people just walked past me as though Im a stranger, or even standing in the lift and yet went unnoticed.I doubt i change that much even if it meant for the hair compared to last year. I saw it in my yearbook and well i look different fullstop, had a ball of time asking around for well wishes anyway.

I lay it down again down at Your feet, do as what You please in this life just as a disciple seek for his Master's way. I <3, always do.

2010-07-07T20:59:00.001+08:00

10 things

1) I just realised that ive never seen chengyee online for ages its cause she isnt in my msn list anymore. Thanks to couple of months back where close to half of my contact lists are gone, so that explains why if you dont see me online anymore. This is damn gay i was just talking to her about it.

2) Physics can just tire my brain cells real quick, i was almost asleep in front of mr tay when he was elaborating about magnetism. He is one cute old man.

3) Studying mood is returning real quick, staying back in school again often with my favourite people =)

4) I hate to eat at the coffeeshop thanks to the number of birds flying around the table. Enough to make me put both of my legs on the chair. Renovation doesnt seem to improve the facilities.

5) I have 3 friggin tests tmr, school have so little mercy on us.

6) I found out the ploy my family has been playing on me, cheating my feelings all these while. We're gonna stay at the universal studios hotel couple of days before prelims start.

7) Its shocking that ive been sleeping beyond midnight for 2 days now and yet im so energised in school.

8) Lizard dropped on my bed two nights ago, it was past midnight and i had to haunt for it. Disgusting creature.

9) Ive been reconsidering my future path that i'll take, everything that ive systematically planned out is rearranged and now its in disarray. Letting nature to take its own course

10) More often than not, i kept eating chocolate like kitkats.

2010-07-05T20:59:00.004+08:00

Excited.

Now ive gotta rid this feeling before it gets the best of me. Been too long, how do i contain this? One photo,old pals, memories, deja vu, feel like seeking but unable to reach. Wanna be there but its impossible.It was my fault for hiding when i moved, this is the concequences ive to bear. How different would everything be i wonder? I regretted, i missed the childhood,people,language. If it is meant to be then it will be.

Let fate decide.

2010-07-04T16:49:00.003+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PRUNE!

A year older, a year wiser! No more bebek bebek times anymore. May God always bless you my dear, you've been great all these while. My ears would be all set if you need anything to rant on. Lets conquer olvls together and go to Jeju with freedom together!

Xiexie for the marshe treat though i think i was too full to the brim.

Gak akan ada cowo2 rese lagi yang bakal injek2 kita lagi yah, waktunya buat blajar jangan kena distract lagi. Cuman lu yang bakal ngerti post ini deh bahasa indonya mantap abis. Hehe blajar bareng yah soon, klo baca ini jgn tralu terharu yah hehehe

2010-07-04T16:43:00.003+08:00

Kaleidoscope first night.

Didnt manage to catch supper with the girls cause my phone was ringing every minute that i had to reached home asap. SOME H2H SESSIONS WITH ALL OF YOU SOON OGAY, REALLY REALLY NEED TO CATCH UP ABOUT LIFE!

Time time time

2010-07-03T10:32:00.006+08:00

Miss you all so much.
Time to get the engine started for my prelims, put aside all distractions and get going.

My atm card is lost for good, im too lazy to go down to any bank to get my replacement. I think i shall just leave myself without a card for weeks, its a good practise to develop an abstinence towards using my card freely. This way, im saving money.

2010-07-01T17:10:00.002+08:00

CHINESE ORALS ARE TMR!

That ogre told me that i lack of coherrence and sound like an alien i'll probably be mistaken as a westerner tommorow. Thanks alot brudder, i'll prove you wrong and get at least a merit.

2010-06-30T21:45:00.003+08:00

Ive been having naps daily in the evening, this is just too great. Wait till i start my revisions and remidials kick in then i can kiss goodbye to all of these pure bliss. Next week i promise for real this time round, no more procrastinating.

Finally finished doing father's day gift though its very last minute but i hope he really likes it cause he has been the best dad ever who prioritise us girls above his own needs. He hates shopping and gets tired easily yet he put up with all the ladies in the house, accompanying us nonetheless. Love you pop, always.

Song of the day: Pixie Lott-Mama do uhohuoh. Jokes for the next few days. Martina get owned badly cause of this.

2010-06-28T18:07:00.002+08:00

I miss this city, the citizens, the friends, the family. How much different would things be if i had not moved at all....
They seemed to get it all, while apprehesion engulfs mewhat if that day would not arrive anytime till the bell rings.

K, enough with that I needa get started with my SS and Geog for my 2 tests tmr, so great 2nd day of school yet im bombed with tests already.

2010-06-25T10:47:00.000+08:00

Its been so long since i bothered to read the daily scripture on my profile page, and bingo i saw it today and it goes like:

"Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you."

Colossians 3:13

Indeed, so true. Forgiveness is the key, effort has to be made and it has to start from me. If not the ghost of you will kept on haunting perpetually.

Lists

2010-06-24T22:57:00.004+08:00

-Ive not touched my books for quite sometime, i should pull up my socks when school re-open.
-Toy story 3 is nice despite me hating cartoon.
-I am really eating alot.
-I hate injection, gave me feverish feeling.
-Ive found something to do after olvls.
-Pardon my chinese if it doesnt sound chinese
-I kinda look forward but yet dread school at the same time.
-I have to do some spring cleaning real bad and donation of clothes.
-Stop appearing in my dreams so frequently, its disturbing.
-I think i can live without technology.
- I love my family, very much in fact.
-I feel like studying alone, plugging my ipod in gwc.
-I just finished slotting all my freshly developed photos into albums.
-Feel like cutting my hair its gonna strain so bad when i start tying it up again but i know i would regret it.
-I am bend on saving money.

Goodnight.